MY CHILDHOOD WAS FULL OF BLOOD, NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCES, AND OSTRICHES. PART 3

Well, I guess I'll finish my amazing trilogy, cause I know all 1 of you are dying to know how i almost died.... That and every time me and Brookie hang out we don't feel like writing a post.... because.. well, we're awesome (We really are) and have more productive things to do with our lives (No we don't)

Anyways, there is a lot of times in my life where I have looked upon deaths ugly face. But all of those times were pretty much because I was just fooling around on high places and running with knives. Or that one time when I climbed onto the roof and couldn't get down so I decided to jump and or fall.... Yeah... I was a stupid child.

The only serious time that I was in real, life threatening danger, was when I had pneumonia... The first time... I recently just got out of the hospital for the second time...The first time was when I was about seven...No I am not sickly.... God... I have no idea how I'm going to make this funny. But I'll try, by using words like amazing, face eating monster who sucks the air from you, butt crunch and draw string.... Yeah.


                          So, here it goes : THE TIME I ALMOST SERIOUSLY DIED.

It was a cold dark, stormy night ( I really don't remember whether it was stormy or not ) I was about seven years of age (maybe six) laying on parents bed... coughing and gasping for air (Oh god this sounds depressing) My mom was frantic and scared. Which was making me wan't to just go ahead and die already because I was getting really annoyed at her asking me if I was doing any better every five seconds. Of course I'm not doing any better I had fucking pneumonia for shits sake! (I'm really contemplating just telling the roof story, cause making this funny is hard...) (To make this better heres a text picture of boobs (  . Y  . ) .... As you can see I'm desperate... Just like your mom was last night! OHHHHH... did I just insult myself?... Anyway) Yeah I had pneumonia.... It sucked.. I wen't to the hospital and some shit brained doctor gave me the wrong medicine and almost killed me..... All I remember is laying there hooked up to one of those machines that helps you do things you would normally be doing.... While my mother cried.... Yeah it was a sad story... Get over it....... The amazing Butt munch, face eating monster, who sucks air from you, likes to pull on your draw string. There, are you happy?

                                                                     THE END

I officially dub this post a FAIL.... But I dubbed my own fail so that makes it a win..... I do not understand the rules of the internet. GOOD NIGHT!